Government Introduces 'Humor Tax' on Puns, Asset Seizure for Failed Jokes

Government implements humor tax on puns as part of 'Linguistic Disaster' countermeasures. AI rates conversation quality in real-time; unfunny jokes trigger immediate tax levy from bank accounts. Silent stare-downs increasingly common in public spaces.

2025-11-02

Translations: JA

Otherworld Pocket

Government Introduces 'Humor Tax' on Puns, Asset Seizure for Failed Jokes

Government implements humor tax on puns as part of “Linguistic Disaster” countermeasures. AI rates conversation quality in real-time; unfunny jokes trigger immediate tax levy from bank accounts. Silent stare-downs increasingly common in public spaces.

The “Language Health Promotion Act,” commonly known as the “Humor Tax Law,” was enacted today, targeting all forms of wordplay from classic puns like “Why did the blanket fly away? Because it was a comforter!” to the tired dad jokes deployed by department heads. The government claims this groundbreaking (or outrageous, depending on perspective) new tax aims to eliminate “unproductive laughter” from citizens’ conversations and promote intelligent, smooth communication.

Acoustic microphones and quantum dot cameras installed on street corners and in offices monitor people’s conversations 24/7. Any puns uttered are immediately transmitted to the supercomputer “WARAI-SCOPE” (Laughter Scope). The AI conducts a comprehensive analysis of phonetic resonance, contextual coherence, subtle movements in the speaker’s facial muscles, and signs of “genuine laughter” appearing in the listener’s brainwaves. It scores out of 100 points, and if the score falls below the baseline of 60 points, a “Flop Tax” ranging from 100 yen to a maximum of 1 million yen is levied according to the degree of unfunniness.

Government Special Public Relations Officer Jun Namerikawa proudly states, “This is linguistic traffic control. Low-quality puns are like illegal parking in intellectual space. They hinder smooth social activities.” Tax revenue will allegedly fund the establishment of a “National Humor Training Center,” though its location and specific activities remain completely undisclosed.

From the first day of implementation, serious impacts have spread throughout society. At an IT company in Tokyo, silence dominated lunchtime. The sales manager, who usually cracked jokes, only made tea-sipping sounds. At home, fathers nationwide have been spotted being implored by their children, “Dad, stop with the puns—our account will freeze.” Life insurance companies have rushed to release “Pun Insurance” to prepare for potential “death by flopping,” and applications are reportedly flooding in.

Some citizens are intensifying their opposition to this situation. The hashtag #OpposeFunnyTax is trending on social media, and rumors are circulating about the formation of an underground organization called the “Pun Club,” which exchanges puns through sign language and written communication to evade government surveillance. They claim “the right to flop” and continue their quiet resistance.

Professor Shizuka Mori, a language psychologist at Toto University, warns, “Attempts to completely eliminate the ‘play’ element in human communication not only kill linguistic creativity but also severely violate human mental freedom.” According to the professor, unfunny puns have historically functioned as a lubricant for human relationships, easing tension.

Will the flame of humor be extinguished from this country? Or is this the dawn of a new era where more refined, supreme puns that even make AI groan will be born? A new maxim—“Silence is golden, eloquence is silver, and puns lead to bankruptcy”—is beginning to spread nationwide with sighs.

Stakeholder Comments

Jun Namerikawa, Special Public Relations Officer: “This is for improving the linguistic level of our citizens. It involves pain, but please consider it an investment in the future.”
AI “WARAI-SCOPE” PR Representative: “We have no emotions. We simply judge funniness with zeros and ones based on algorithms. By the way, that comment just scored 23 points.”
Sales Manager (48 years old, anonymous): “I almost said ‘The meeting agenda is… packed with shellfish!’ in a conference and bit my tongue. Nearly lost my bonus.”
Underground Organization “Pun Club” Leader: “We don’t fear flopping. Even if this blanket flies away, our souls will continue to burn!”
Professor Mori (Language Psychology): “The warmth of communication existed precisely in being called ‘cold.’ How ironic.”
Bank Account: “Recently, there have been many unexplained withdrawals, and my balance is looking lonely. I can’t laugh anymore.”
Puns Themselves: “What’s our reason for existing…? To land or to flop, that is the question.”
Silence: “My value is higher than ever. This truly is the era of ‘silence is golden.’”
Humor Tax: “Thanks to everyone, tax revenue is doing well. We sincerely appreciate the citizens’ ‘flops.’”
Blanket: “Please stop making me fly anymore. This is reputational damage.”

International Expressions

Haiku

Puns are told / Accounts freeze over / Autumn sky
AI listens / Ears pricked up / Winter town
Fearing tax / Becoming silent / Lunch table
Every flop / Wallet grows cold / Winter wind
Funniness / Being appraised / End of the world
Language play / Not allowed / Surveillance eyes
Cold jokes / Assets freezing / Tax system
Without laughter / In the office echoes / Sound of keys
Resistance / Written puns / Moonlight
Silence is / Golden now / Just a fact

Kanji / Chinese Characters

政府言語災害対策面白税導入 AI 会話採点低評価即時課税巷無言人々急増中

Emoji

🗣️ puns ➡️ 🤖📉 ➡️ 💸😭 ➡️ 🤐👥

Onomatopoeia

Silence… Clack clack… (keyboard typing sounds) Whisper whisper… Beep! (AI judgment starts) Buzzzz! (Unfunny judgment) Whoosh… (sound of money disappearing from account) Silence…