'Weekend hero shows are just massacres.' Demanding a ban on explosive finishing moves for Sustainable Domination Goals (SDGs). Until certified, all monsters will shift to telework and destroy the city using Zoom virtual backgrounds.
'Saint's Prayer' deemed to lack scientific basis and becomes fully self-pay. As Japanese patients face uncertainty, the Demon King's Army begins recruiting with 'Full Recovery & Resurrection Benefits'. Record number of transfer notifications submitted.
While AI diagnosis becomes free, the "let me see your throat" from a living doctor has become an ultra-luxury option. Patients leaving the examination room collapse in tears saying "it felt so human," and the number of young people getting stethoscope mark tattoos is skyrocketing.
The 'Allergy Reactor', which converts the shock of sneezing into heat, saves the cold wave. However, accidents where body temperature reaches boiling point occur frequently as users inhale pollen directly in search of 'stronger warmth'. Investors buy up cedar forests, and severe hay fever patients become 'high-output bio-talent' with tripled annual incomes in this abnormal situation.
Despite rumors of "exhaust gas contamination," the 20,000 yen "Morning Mist Terrine" sold out completely. Guests took photos of empty plates with their smartphones, tearing up and saying, "It tastes like rich nothingness." The organizer boasts it as "the ultimate form of SDGs," but trash cans at the venue were overflowing with wrappers of convenience store rice balls eaten in secret.
"If there are no tourist resources, just make the guests unable to move." The depopulated village devised a brutal plan to push tourists to the limit with muscle training immediately after arrival, leaving them bedridden with severe muscle pain. The "ultimate regression to infancy experience," where immobile guests are diligently cared for by local elderly people, has struck a chord with the responsibility-weary urban elite, causing the village's diaper consumption to skyrocket.
A humanitarian crisis is deepening in wealthy residential districts where luxury ingredients have been cut off. At a 5-star hotel serving as a shelter, survivors break down in tears over A5-rank Wagyu beef rations, complaining the "marbling is too coarse." The UN rushed to dispatch a sommelier unit, but a mistake in vintage designation has plunged the scene into further chaos and despair.
While couples tear up at the "On-Time Departure Meteor Shower" coloring the night sky, astronomers expose a merciless truth. The bands of light were actually a traffic jam of wealthy rockets commuting from Mars villas to Earth. Directed at the lights to which commoners on the ground pray for "happiness," the honking sound of "Move it, poor people!" echoes in the sky.
A new therapy involving shooting electromagnetically accelerated acupuncture needles into pressure points at supersonic speeds has emerged to save writers pushed to their limits before deadlines. While the exhilarating sensation of physically obliterating stubborn stiffness is popular, there have been successive reports of damage, such as pen tablets being shattered by shockwaves and holes being blown into apartments. Voices of joy and confusion are mixed: "My shoulders are light, but I have no home."
Space venture's "UFO Commuting" service goes up in flames just 3 days after launch. The Galactic Federation has sued for defamation due to excessive stereotyping, citing pilots wearing cheap alien masks. They are also demanding an apology for the "We come in peace" (Warewareha) intonation, claiming it is a discriminatory imitation of a specific region.