Tooth Fairy Goes Gig Economy: Baby Teeth Now Assessed as 'Deliverables' with S-F Rankings, Low-Grade Teeth Returned Cash-on-Delivery

Tooth Fairy Goes Gig Economy: Baby Teeth Now Assessed as 'Deliverables' with S-F Rankings, Low-Grade Teeth Returned Cash-on-Delivery

In response to inflation, the Tooth Fairy Guild completely overhauls its compensation system. Under-pillow coins are abolished, replaced by an AI performance-based system that evaluates teeth based on 'dramatic loss circumstances' and 'parental social media engagement rates.' While high-scoring teeth are minted as NFTs, F-rank teeth are returned cash-on-delivery with 'improvement feedback.'

Translations: JA
Money Maze
"I Wish It Had Stayed Silent" Cries Pet Owner: Sea Anemone Translator Endlessly Plays Neighbor Clownfish's Gossip

"I Wish It Had Stayed Silent" Cries Pet Owner: Sea Anemone Translator Endlessly Plays Neighbor Clownfish's Gossip

The latest AI-powered "Sea Anemone Translator" has transformed a peaceful aquarium into chaos. The translations reveal nothing but malicious gossip: "Has that orange guy gotten fat lately?" "Isn't the heater particularly harsh on just me?" Users report psychological distress, prompting the developer to promise an emergency "Privacy Mode" update. Meanwhile, the Marine Biology Linguistics Society praised the AI's accuracy, calling it "perfect down to the gossip's inflection."

Translations: JA
Daily Surprise
"Taro is Family" Giant Cricket Tasting Event Canceled Due to Children's Tears. SDGs Education Reaches Unexpected Conclusion

"Taro is Family" Giant Cricket Tasting Event Canceled Due to Children's Tears. SDGs Education Reaches Unexpected Conclusion

The "Giant Cricket Breeding" program recommended by the Ministry of Education has developed into unexpected emotional dramas in households nationwide. After spending summer vacation together, children have formed bonds with their now-pet crickets, sobbing "We can't eat Taro" while boycotting tasting events. Some households report crickets have even taken up residence on TV remote controls.

Translations: JA
Culture Kaleidoscope
Cabinet Approves Bill to Mandate Nationwide "Crawling Forward"; Major Developers Announce "Horizontally Long Apartments"

Cabinet Approves Bill to Mandate Nationwide "Crawling Forward"; Major Developers Announce "Horizontally Long Apartments"

Following the discovery of a snake fossil, the government has approved a bill mandating all citizens to crawl as part of a "return to human origins." Aimed at promoting health, violators will be charged with "standing up crime." In response, major developers announced "horizontally long apartments" without elevators, sending their stock prices to the daily limit.

Translations: JA
Social Lab
Ancient Humans May Have Gone Extinct from Making PowerPoints: 'Agenda' and 'KPI' Found on Cave Walls

Ancient Humans May Have Gone Extinct from Making PowerPoints: 'Agenda' and 'KPI' Found on Cave Walls

Cave paintings discovered at a new ancient human site show extensive use of charts and bullet points. Researchers conclude they spent more time preparing for 'regular reporting meetings' than hunting, leading to extinction by malnutrition. While warning 'it's time to reconsider our way of working,' the discoverers themselves are busy making slides for academic presentations.

Translations: JA
Otherworld Pocket
National Senior Federation Unifies Retirement Funds as 'Physical Lemon Payment'; Pension Offices Enveloped in Citrus Aroma

National Senior Federation Unifies Retirement Funds as 'Physical Lemon Payment'; Pension Offices Enveloped in Citrus Aroma

"The citric acid cycle is the ultimate asset management" - With the government's new policy, retirement savings become mountains of lemons. Recipients sleep on lemon pillows and give lemons as New Year's gifts to grandchildren in this bizarre new custom. "The tears from the sourness are tears of joy," claim seniors as real tears stream down their faces.

Translations: JA
Muscle Arena
Currency Evaporates in Heatwave, Pasta Becomes Legal Tender

Currency Evaporates in Heatwave, Pasta Becomes Legal Tender

Following widespread reports of banknotes physically melting in record-breaking heat, the government has designated dry pasta as legal tender in an emergency measure. Since boiling is now considered 'currency destruction,' families must coordinate dinner menus with their savings plans.

Translations: JA
Money Maze