Muscle Fibers File Class Action Lawsuit, Claiming Their Growth Story Was "Spoiled." Trainers' "One More Rep!" Accused of Premature Disclosure

Muscle Fibers File Class Action Lawsuit, Claiming Their Growth Story Was "Spoiled." Trainers' "One More Rep!" Accused of Premature Disclosure

The American Federation of Muscle Fibers (AFMA) has condemned many trainers for statements made during training sessions such as "This is where the real growth begins," claiming they prematurely revealed the climax known as supercompensation. According to their statement, the fibers claim they "wanted to enjoy growth with pure feelings" and are suffering emotional distress.

Translations: JA
Muscle Arena
Popular 'Phantom Butter' lottery sparks controversy as products 'directly appear' at winners' homes. Manufacturer claims it's 'the latest delivery experience'

Popular 'Phantom Butter' lottery sparks controversy as products 'directly appear' at winners' homes. Manufacturer claims it's 'the latest delivery experience'

In the much-talked-about 'Phantom Butter' lottery campaign, products failed to arrive to winners as expected. Instead, butter was directly applied to toast and TV remote controls, causing a bizarre incident. Social media was flooded with reports such as 'I woke up to find my bread toasted' and 'My pet is covered in butter.' The manufacturer commented that it is 'a future food distribution system that doesn't burden customers,' further fueling confusion.

Translations: JA
Daily Surprise
"I Thought I Was Going to Die" Heart Rate Graph Wins Contemporary Art Award. Bear Demands Credit as "Co-Creator"

"I Thought I Was Going to Die" Heart Rate Graph Wins Contemporary Art Award. Bear Demands Credit as "Co-Creator"

A man who narrowly escaped a bear encounter receives an unexpected sequel. The terrifying heart rate graph recorded by his dropped smart water bottle has won the Contemporary Art Grand Prize as a "digitized cry of life." While the jury praises it as "despair not seen since Picasso," a lawyer claiming to represent the bear has begun demanding rights as a co-creator and half of the prize money.

Translations: JA
Culture Kaleidoscope
Parliament Decides Bill Weight Through Bench Press: 'Voice of the People' Too Heavy for Anyone to Lift

Parliament Decides Bill Weight Through Bench Press: 'Voice of the People' Too Heavy for Anyone to Lift

A new process has been introduced in the basement of the Parliament building to literally measure the 'importance' of bills by weight. Each lawmaker attaches bills as plates to a barbell, with the lifted weight directly correlating to support rate. In recent deliberations, the 'Triple Lawmaker Salary Bill' was unanimously passed as light as a feather, while the petition set named 'Voice of the People' was too heavy to even budge from the floor.

Translations: JA
Social Lab
Poverty Survivor Game Update Adds "Noble Mode" - Players Score Points by Throwing Bread at the Poor in Cruel But Popular Feature

Poverty Survivor Game Update Adds "Noble Mode" - Players Score Points by Throwing Bread at the Poor in Cruel But Popular Feature

Flamingo Finance Inc. announced on the 14th their hit smartphone game "Poverty Survivor" now features "Noble Mode" where players can play from a wealthy perspective. Players score points by throwing bread at starving NPCs from a carriage and judging their reactions. The developer claims "educational intent to teach the difficulty of charity," but #NobleHobby is trending on social media.

Translations: JA
Showbiz Pavilion
"This is Overtime!" Hero Strikes by Stabbing Holy Sword into Floor, Forms Union with Demon Lord

"This is Overtime!" Hero Strikes by Stabbing Holy Sword into Floor, Forms Union with Demon Lord

As children's cheers filled the air, the hero suddenly halted the show. "Defeating the demon lord isn't in my contract. This is clearly overtime," he declared, driving his holy sword into the stage. The demon lord, a student part-timer hired for 980 yen per hour, agreed, proclaiming "Workers' rights!" Both parties are now negotiating to establish an interdimensional labor union.

Translations: JA
Otherworld Pocket
Grandma's Spicy Ohagi Causes Illegal Muscle Growth; Bodybuilding World Trembles as Sweet Shop Owner Becomes Wanted 'Muscle Trafficker'

Grandma's Spicy Ohagi Causes Illegal Muscle Growth; Bodybuilding World Trembles as Sweet Shop Owner Becomes Wanted 'Muscle Trafficker'

All top finishers at the National Bodybuilding Championship disqualified. Unknown compounds from a local sweet shop's 'Spicy Protein Ohagi' detected in their muscles. The 82-year-old shop owner stated, 'I just added extra spices thinking my grandson would enjoy it.' The committee is now investigating the ohagi confiscation and the elderly woman's connections with full force.

Translations: JA
Muscle Arena
"Floppy Disk Organization Skills" Recognized as National Living Treasure: Government Permanently Bans All Digital Connections to Preserve Technique

"Floppy Disk Organization Skills" Recognized as National Living Treasure: Government Permanently Bans All Digital Connections to Preserve Technique

A man who has mastered the "art of floppy disk organization" through years of dedication has been recognized as a National Living Treasure. While the Agency for Cultural Affairs praises it as "a divine skill impossible for AI to replicate," a special law has been immediately enacted to permanently ban internet, USB, and even Bluetooth connections for both the man and his floppy disks to protect this rare skill. The man smiled quietly, saying, "Now I can devote myself to 1.44MB wholeheartedly."

Translations: JA
Money Maze