AI Film Festival Classifies 'Thrill' as 'Health Hazard'—Grand Prize Awarded to 2-Hour Film of a Motionless Rock
Determining that 'catharsis is poison to blood vessels,' the jury AI removed all conflict and resolution from all screened films. The grand prize went to an ambient video that simply displays a moss-covered rock. During the screening, all smartwatches in the theater simultaneously detected 'deep sleep,' prompting a standing ovation not from the film industry, but from the medical community, hailing it as 'the savior of modern humanity.'