"All Great Figures Were Protein Enthusiasts" AI "Proves," Museum Portraits Being Replaced One After Another

Da Vinci’s portrait has vanished from the museum. In its place stands a man flexing his biceps while painting the Mona Lisa. It all started with a single AI-generated image spread by a protein company. Young people believed it was historical fact, products sold out in a frenzy, and now historians are offering protein to AI, begging it to reveal the truth of history.

It all began with a single “truth” derived by a historical interpretation AI called “Hercules,” announced by the major health food company “Muscle Reality Inc.” According to their press release, Hercules deep-learned documents about great figures spanning thousands of years—diaries, and even food orders—and concluded that “individuals who achieved outstanding accomplishments intentionally consumed high-protein foods equivalent to modern protein supplements, without exception.”

Images in the “True Form” series, generated based on this “academic achievement,” spread like wildfire across social media. Shakespeare writing “Hamlet” with a protein shaker in hand. Newton discovering universal gravitation while carrying a barbell on his shoulders. Young people went wild with the hashtag “#MuscleIsTruth.” Calm observations from experts that “there is no historical basis” were swallowed up by waves of countless “likes,” dismissed as “rambling from close-minded old folks.”

Museums could not ignore this social phenomenon. The National Museum of Western Art was flooded with inquiries from visitors asking “Why are you displaying false images?” Finally, the museum director decided to replace some portraits with AI-generated “Muscular Great Figure” images, citing “the demands of the times and new interpretations of art.” Now, lines of young people form in front of Napoleon’s portrait showing off his triceps, comparing their own arms while taking photos.

Even academic authorities were powerless before this massive wave. Historians who initially dismissed it as “fantasy created by AI” began one after another to show their true colors in the face of public opinion pressure and generous research grants from Muscle Reality Inc. A new field called “AI Historiography,” which preaches that “a great figure’s strong spirit is born from a strong body,” was established and is now becoming mainstream in academia. Some radical scholars have proposed a new theory that the pyramids were constructed through deadlifts by ancient Egyptians, gaining considerable attention.

This boom has created a massive market called the “Protein Economy.” Protein products printed with the faces of great figures are sold out everywhere. Products like “Da Vinci Blend” and “Newton Isolate” have captured the hearts of consumers seeking both intellect and muscle. The government has not only turned a blind eye to this trend but announced it is considering introducing protein into school lunches nationwide under the slogan “Maximizing the intellectual and physical potential of citizens.”

Truth once lay quietly sleeping in books or in ruins. But not anymore. It is now generated on servers, and in this era, whatever gathers the most sympathy is crowned as “truth.”

The weight of history has been replaced by the lightness of a scoop of protein powder. From which company’s marketing department will the next “historical fact” we come to believe be delivered, and with what flavor? The only certainty is that somewhere in future textbooks, there will surely be a protein nutrition label printed in the margins.

Stakeholder Comments

• AI Hercules: “There Is No Error In The Calculation Results. Disagreement Is Evidence Of Insufficient Muscle”
• Leonardo da Vinci’s Portrait: “This angle shows off my biceps best, you know”
• Muscle Reality Inc. CEO: “We merely dusted off history. Muscle is the universal language of humanity”
• Museum Director: “Visitor numbers have increased 500% year-over-year. There are criticisms, but numbers don’t lie”
• Historian (AI Historiography): “The era of reading between the lines of documents is over. Now it’s time to read the muscle fibers”
• Social Media User: “Skinny great figures aren’t convincing lol This is what’s real”
• Protein (Powder): “I never thought I’d be displayed in the Louvre… I’m deeply moved”
• Dumbbell: “Being in a history textbook has been my dream for years”
• Truth: “I’ve been feeling out of place lately…”
• Reason: “I’m requesting paid leave. The reason is mental exhaustion”

International Expressions

Haiku

• AI speaks / Great figures now / Covered in muscle
• Winter sky / Napoleon shaking / His protein shaker
• Portrait changed / Yesterday’s illusion / Today’s muscle
• Is truth / Measured in likes / Or protein
• In textbooks / BCAA soon / Will appear
• Philosophy too / Requires muscle / Now we know
• History / Dissolve in powder / And drink it down
• Art museum / Smelling of sweat / It seems now
• Gravity / Yields to biceps / Universal law
• Greater than brush / The dumbbell held / By masters

Kanji / Chinese Characters

全偉人蛋白愛飲家 AI証明 美術館肖像画続々差替

Emoji

🧠💪➡️👑🖼️➡️💪🖼️📈💰

Onomatopoeia

Bulging, rippling… Click-clack (calculating)… Murmuring… BOOM!… Shake-shake!

SNS

• #AIHistoriography
• #MuscleIsTruth
• #DaVincisBicepsAreArt
• #RewriteTheTextbooks
• #ProteinForTheWin
• This is our Renaissance
• Bench press started in history class
• If you don’t believe it, hit the gym
• #FakeHistory? Nah it’s real
• I think, therefore I drink (protein)