Tag: Diet

Articles tagged with "Diet" (5 articles)

Too Thin and Falling Through Gaps: Popular Drug Sales Suspended — Railway Company 'Physically Impossible to Detect'

Too Thin and Falling Through Gaps: Popular Drug Sales Suspended — Railway Company 'Physically Impossible to Detect'

'It's not a side effect, it's a physics bug.' A sudden surge in cases where users of a popular diet drug are falling into and disappearing through train station platform gaps and drain covers. They are so thin that automatic doors don't react, leaving many users stranded in the city. As an emergency measure, the manufacturer has started recommending placing weights in clothing shoulder pads.

Translations: JA
Daily Surprise
National Tax Agency Classifies Dieting as 'Asset Concealment': Gym Users Face Mass Tax Evasion Raids

National Tax Agency Classifies Dieting as 'Asset Concealment': Gym Users Face Mass Tax Evasion Raids

"Body fat is the nation's strategic energy reserve." Under the new law, weight loss is now considered intentional asset disposal (tax evasion). Late-night jogging is monitored as "shadow incineration," and saunas are flagged as "illegal depletion operations." Today, a major fitness club in Tokyo was raided as a "large-scale tax evasion guidance facility," and protein users were detained on suspicion of evidence destruction.

Translations: JA
Social Lab
Overcalorie Electric Shock: Subscription 'Smart Bento Box' Crashes Servers with Reservation Rush

Overcalorie Electric Shock: Subscription 'Smart Bento Box' Crashes Servers with Reservation Rush

The monthly subscription smart bento box 'NutriGuard 3000' sold out its initial production run due to overwhelming reservations. This device forcibly manages eating habits by delivering a mild electric current to users who attempt to eat outside designated meal times or exceed calorie limits. While developers praise it as 'the ultimate self-management tool,' rumors suggest that jailbreak services for 'dessert mode' are circulating on dark web sites for high prices.

Translations: JA
Showbiz Pavilion
Fart-Powered Scale Always Shows Lower Weight

Fart-Powered Scale Always Shows Lower Weight

A 'self-powered scale' that generates electricity by blowing intestinal gas into sensors has been released. While users rejoice that 'it gets lighter every time I measure,' experts scratch their heads wondering 'if the numbers are accurate.'

Translations: JA
Muscle Arena