Articles tagged with "Startup" (6 articles)
"MeteorTalk," a new social media platform from an AI startup that lets users send DMs solely to meteors on a collision course with Earth, is going viral. Messages automatically self-destruct the moment the meteor enters the atmosphere, and with no plans to ever implement human replies, users are praising it as "way better than being left on read."
Promotional photos for an ultra-luxury space tourism venture advertised an "undiscovered nebula" that was actually microscopic mold on stale pastry. When the CEO doubled down, claiming that "the essence of the cosmos is identical in both the micro and macro," pseudo-intellectual investors wept at its "profundity" and pledged additional billions in funding.
Tech giant GooGull has announced "MyRights," a subscription service for all humanity. The $5/month plan guarantees "the right to breathe" and "sleep once a week." If payment is delayed by 3 days, your social ID is frozen—a feature users are praising as "highly transparent."
At the launch event for "Stealth Pocket," a next-generation wearable boasting ultimate concealment, the CEO wearing the demo unit lost the pocket on stage. After 30 minutes of self-searching, he tearfully declared the immediate cancellation of the project, stating "concealment has completely surpassed practicality."
Next-generation food product 'Hero's Drops' extracts the minds of historical figures using AI. Consumers of the hit product 'Napoleon Flavor' report side effects like 'suddenly tucking hand into chest during meetings' and 'abnormal concern about height.' Developer responds: 'That's a feature.'
A startup announces a 'Dream Job' side gig where simply getting into bed generates hourly wages, but upon waking, the transfer history disappears and the terms of service turn out to be an illusion.